things that make me twitch

[kaigou]

Reading online short story while waiting for d/l to finish... and I hit one of those dreaded Mental Edit Moments. It's truly sad that I hit this all the time since I do love thrillers/action-mysteries, although off-genre is the worst at this kind of oversight -- that is, where author's selling genre is non-action, such as romance or SFF, but the author is adopting the tropes or veneer of an action/thriller.

In this instance, Black and Starr are undercover agents for the city police department (JCPD). Black has been off on his own scoping a potential bust when his fellow agent catches up with him. Starr begins to give Black grief about hanging out in the worst part of town.

Black started to walk past ... but a pale, surprisingly strong hand caught his arm, restraining him. "This is no place for a JC2 agent," Starr said, all teasing gone from his voice. "If someone recognizes you down here, they'll stretch out your death for days."

"You risk the same," Black told him, staring into the feline green eyes. "A snitch for the JCPD is just as bad."

I mean, really, is it all that hard to keep in mind that there truly can be ears and eyes everywhere? And is it all that hard to remember that someone -- be it human, superhuman, nonhuman, or creature -- who survives via deception (like an undercover agent) is not going to just randomly spill his/her top secret without effort? Characters who survive by keeping secrets should keep those secrets, not stand around blabbing them on street corners.

Dear author: when you put your story in the city, do try to remember that cities are FILLED WITH PEOPLE. And when your characters are undercover, do please make some effort to remember the character has a SECRET identity, not a broadly-publicized one. That's right: undercover + city = SHUT YOUR CHARACTERS UP. Nolove, me.

Comments

[maldoror-gw.livejournal.com]

Isn't part of the problem, too, that a lot of readers lap up these books and don't seem to be part of the Nitpickers Extraordinaire Club mind too much? The latest example of clunking plot development of that sort that I read was in a book with widespread popularity which I will not name because its fans will instantly gather to lynch me. I remember staring at the page for thirty seconds, going 'no, he didn't. Seriously. He didn't just do that. That's NOT going to be an essential plot point. Is it??' and then my next thought was 'how the hell does a reasonably-known and published author think he can get away with something like that?!' The answer to that question being, his fans don't mind, they're not in it for the plot, they're in it for The Cool. That's why there are Mary Sue vamp books aplenty out there, and SF heroes who bone every single female that cross their path, and Harlequin romances badly disguised as fantasy. Because plenty of people will buy them, and the publishers have no moral qualms when it comes to choosing between literary value and the dollar sign.

Books that have both solid plot, good characterisation, and plenty of punch, are far and few between ;_; This is why I don't read much anymore, and never without a solid recommendation. *misses your book recs*

Good luck on THe Mission. I've given up.