this is not my happy face.

[kaigou]

I have an interview tomorrow. (Nothing big there, been on the search for a few weeks now, but that's another story involving many complaints about the "hot new title" in my industry and the number of managers who seem to be renaming all sorts of non-title jobs to the title, and wasting my time in interviews.) This position is not confused (as far as I can tell, at least) about the title/definition, but it's...

Well, it's a lunch interview.

Y'know, there's a reason I use my initials on my resume and my portfolio and my online site. Not just the basics of not letting anyone have the option of assuming that because I am Gender A or Gender B that I can (or can't) do the job. But also because I've done my share of interviews-in-bars, and interviews-at-lunch, and while I'm not 18 anymore (so I doubt it's necessarily the exact same dynamics), I can't forget those lessons. Lunches are what you do with friends, and dates. You are not on a date with your potential employer, and the casual situation makes it too easy for some guys (already in a position of power via gender, and then as potential employer) to make things even murkier.

Sign me up so very not.

On top of that, I did a search for restaurants around the office's location, because I want to know what else to suggest in case the primary suggestion is Italian. (Pasta, you're great, but you attack people who eat you, and same for you, Pho.) Oh, look, it's nothing but bar food. Independently owned, but you can't tell me that Joe's Bar, Logan's Bar, and something-or-other Bar & Grill, times ten, is going to be anything other than, well, bar food. I loathe bar food. Not because it's bad, but because it's boring. Life is too goddamn short to eat bar food.

(And life is way too goddamn short to eat what American bars believe passes for Irish food. You Irish on my flist, you know I like you, but the American bar concept of Irish food leaves a great deal to be desired.)

Or we could walk the two blocks to the nearest acceptable restaurant -- a Thai place. A quarter-mile away (about two blocks and hang a right, go a block). In 101F heat. For a fucking job interview.

And then I must ask: am I going to be expected to pay for my half? Why? I didn't ask to go on this fucking lunch date. I'd be just as happy not having to walk anywhere in 101F heat at 1pm, thank you, and I'd be just fine sitting in a nice, cool, air-conditioned conference room for an hour. And I wouldn't even have to pay for the benefit of being forced to stomach bar food.

Oh! And I could do it WITHOUT HAVING TO TALK OVER THE UBIQUITOUS TELEVISION IN THE GODDAMN BACKGROUND.

I mean, I don't mind going out to eat. But if I'm going to pay for it, then I want to eat something I enjoy eating, and on top of that, I want to eat it with someone I want to be with. That list of people is really fucking short, and it does not include -- nor will it ever include -- an employer, let alone a potential employer. I am not interested in a fucking social life as part of my job. And I sure as hell don't want to be fighting to keep my attention solid, while choking down bar food, and trying to hear someone (or yell at someone) over the goddamn background noise. Is this an interview, or the equivalent of an introvert's stress test? And I'm supposed to pay for this pleasure?

I really hope I get word in the morning from the second interview with that other company. The one that -- ironically enough -- has offices within walking distance of one of the town's best sushi restaurants. I'm addicted to their sushi. But I still wouldn't go there for an interview.

Comments

[nagasvoice]

On the surface this sounds completely inappropriate, verging on invitation to harassment. Also, my employer's official rules would consider that kind of setting totally unfair selection among different candidates. In private industry, it still strikes me as odd, but perhaps that's the only time this person has left over from other meetings. Otherwise, why do they need to see what your social manners are like? Given nervous stomach during interviews, personally I would probably avoid eating, just sip something.

[kaigou]

I don't think it's a matter of no time to eat -- as they asked about "lunch interview" and I said, I expect I may be busy until noon, and wouldn't be available until about 1pm. And got a quick response back that 1pm lunch would be fine.

Yes, it feels highly inappropriate (see also my response to Tess, above) -- but it also makes me feel like I'm being put on the spot. I never have reason to say, in a work environment, that my hearing is bad in one ear. I never work in work environments where I have to hear things over a loud and constant distraction, like a television or a loud stereo system. But to have to come up with a way to say, "could we please eat somewhere that doesn't have a television or music playing?" is tantamount to being forced to say -- before the interview has even begun -- "hi! I have a disability! and I'm even asking you to make concessions! just think of how demanding I'll be as an employee!"

Wow. I find myself filled with less and less enthusiasm as the minutes pass. Quelle shock.

[christeos-pir.livejournal.com]

<< But to have to come up with a way to say, "could we please eat somewhere that doesn't have a television or music playing?" is tantamount to being forced to say -- before the interview has even begun -- "hi! I have a disability! and I'm even asking you to make concessions! just think of how demanding I'll be as an employee!" >>

Actually, what it says to me is anywhere from "This was an imbecilic idea" to "This is really rude." But then I'm not the kind of idiot to suggest such a thing.

Team lunches are one thing. Trying to conduct an interview in an inappropriate setting while assessing the candidate's ability to field--and ask--important questions under trying circumstances is another.

[kaigou]

I may be an omnivore, but I figure, if the guy doesn't even ask ahead of time whether I'm a vegetarian or have any dietary restrictions, then that's a major flag right there. I'm not the kind of person to say something right then, but it sure would color my impression of the kind of work environment the guy would probably foster. (Not like I'd have anything else to go on, after all, if we're not even in the office.)

Especially since, now that I've checked, there aren't any vegetarian or kosher restaurants within a three-block radius.

[christeos-pir.livejournal.com]

It would be interesting if someone told them they were on a restricted diet--kosher, say--and then if they didn't get hired, sued for discrimination.

[christeos-pir.livejournal.com]

OTOH, for $80-90k, I'll eat their Bennigan's or whatever during an interview and ask for seconds. };->

[kaigou]

If they were offering a competitive salary, then I'd consider it.

But they're not, and strangely that makes me less inclined to be generous.

[kaigou]

Although, fine, I can admit it: I'm just ornery enough to demand a vegetarian or kosher restaurant, just to throw a wrench in the works. I suppose that's passive-aggressive, but it's also the reaction I have to a situation that already feels kinda passive-aggressive in some way.

[christeos-pir.livejournal.com]

Anyway (I forgot to say), I don't think it's tantamount to putting a disability on the table so much as it is saying "Sorry, but with all this racket it's really hard to follow what you're saying."

IOW, if you can't hear (or concentrate), it's not your fault.