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kaigouI know I've got med-folks on my flist, somewhere out there, and I've got a bizarre medical hypothetical for ya. Any other folks with reasonable (or failing that, amusing) ideas also welcome.
Let's say I like to wear a bracelet per wrist. Each one is relatively close-fitting (about as close as the average watch band, let's say), and closes by such an ingenious mechanism that it'd take Houdini (or me being awake enough to instruct) to get out of the thing -- which means it's not coming off easily, and it won't come off with bolt-cutters since the band is too tight to get the cutter between skin and metal. AND, here's the kicker, for some reason (just GO WITH ME ON THIS ONE, okay?) it's decorated not with your usual gemstones or cheap charms but with rare-earth magnets. Y'know, the ones that will attach themselves to the nearest metallic object and not come off for love or money.
AND, finally, let's assume I'm passed out, say, post car-accident but without indications that major surgery is potential: heart is okay, no sign of bleeding, no indication of internal bleeding, but possible fractures, perhaps, and looking like maybe some exhaustion and/or alcohol and/or strong knock to the head. Basically, whatever combination gets me "passed-out and unable to answer questions BUT not likely to be rushed into O.R. right away and not on death's door", okay?
Is there some kind of EMT secret weapon that would/could remove even an 1"-wide metal bracelet fitted so closely?
If the jewelry is not easily removable, would it just be left alone?
(Although I would guess if, say, arm is broken! then bracelet would definitely have to come off before bone could be set/wrapped, right?)
Would the inclusion of the magnets mess with hospital/ambulance stuff? Would they mess with it REALLY badly or just kind of or not really much at all -- okay, except for maybe having arm suddenly attach itself securely to the gurney's handles, whoops.
Yeah, I know, crazy-crazy, don't ask, but really there's a reason for my madness. Really!
Let's say I like to wear a bracelet per wrist. Each one is relatively close-fitting (about as close as the average watch band, let's say), and closes by such an ingenious mechanism that it'd take Houdini (or me being awake enough to instruct) to get out of the thing -- which means it's not coming off easily, and it won't come off with bolt-cutters since the band is too tight to get the cutter between skin and metal. AND, here's the kicker, for some reason (just GO WITH ME ON THIS ONE, okay?) it's decorated not with your usual gemstones or cheap charms but with rare-earth magnets. Y'know, the ones that will attach themselves to the nearest metallic object and not come off for love or money.
AND, finally, let's assume I'm passed out, say, post car-accident but without indications that major surgery is potential: heart is okay, no sign of bleeding, no indication of internal bleeding, but possible fractures, perhaps, and looking like maybe some exhaustion and/or alcohol and/or strong knock to the head. Basically, whatever combination gets me "passed-out and unable to answer questions BUT not likely to be rushed into O.R. right away and not on death's door", okay?
Is there some kind of EMT secret weapon that would/could remove even an 1"-wide metal bracelet fitted so closely?
If the jewelry is not easily removable, would it just be left alone?
(Although I would guess if, say, arm is broken! then bracelet would definitely have to come off before bone could be set/wrapped, right?)
Would the inclusion of the magnets mess with hospital/ambulance stuff? Would they mess with it REALLY badly or just kind of or not really much at all -- okay, except for maybe having arm suddenly attach itself securely to the gurney's handles, whoops.
Yeah, I know, crazy-crazy, don't ask, but really there's a reason for my madness. Really!
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Date: 6 Nov 2008 08:34 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 8 Nov 2008 12:28 am (UTC)Convince him to stop cleaning up and go to the hospital, that's what. Oh. Well, how about no, does no sound good? Because cooks don't listen to non-cooks.
(Three hours later I finally got him into the car & off to the hospital, with the fingertip in a bloody plastic bag along with lots of ice and all the carrots he'd been chopping. At least, we hoped it was in there, since no one wanted to actually check. Meanwhile, he's got his hand wrapped in bloody towel and then in plastic bag, because they'd been down to three thanks to sudden illness and he couldn't just, y'know, LEAVE, even if he was kinda bleeding. KINDA!?)
If you're wondering, life is a lot easier now that I don't have to live with grease and blood. Ergh.