my nomination for the year's best damn rant

[kaigou]

So you've probably heard about the Alabama proposal to ban all books by, and/or about, homosexuals. That's what prompted this rant by Hal Duncan on the Homosexual Agenda, over at Notes from the Geek Show. Read it. It's snarling and frothing and all the things a good rant should be, directed at the author of the Alabama bill and his cronies who let the bill die through abstaining, not through standing up and saying it wasn't acceptable.

Because we will not just stand against you, Gerald Fuckwit Allen. We will not just draw “a line in the sand”, batten down the hatches and defend our way of life in craven terror, bigotry and paranoia as you do. No, we will hunt you down and take the fight right to your fucking doorstep. We will unleash the full force of our fury in a hissy fit the like of which you've never seen. Handbags at dawn, Gerald Fuckwit Allen. We challenge you. We call you out, if you’re man enough to face us. Don’t worry. We don’t want to fuck your scrawny ass. We just want to kick it into next year.

Comments

[christeos-pir.livejournal.com]

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Now, slow down – I know what you’re all thinking. You think that if millions of people put a book of matches into an envelope and mail it to Representative Gerald Allen it will assist him in his book burning plans. Wouldn’t that help to create a truly huge fire hazard in his office? The whole Legislature will get mad at him if millions of Americans do that. And if those millions of helpful Americans are innacurate about their return addresses on their envelopes, it will make it impossible for the Post Office or police to trace them back to their senders. Is that what you want? Eh?

Dirty tricks. Since Gerald’s real plan is to bury books, can’t you be satisfied with mailing him some dirt? Dirt is what he’s planning on using. Make yourself truly useful, and pick some truly dirty dirt for Gerald. He’s made it clear that he needs plenty.

Copy cat. Since Gerald’s real intention is to enhance his reputation in right wing circles by fostering the worst impulses of the most hateful and ignorant people out there, you can best help him by sending him stunning and accurate Xerox copies of things that will inflame him and his followers. Things he will definitely want to bury. Or hide in his desk drawer for, um, later.

Oh, the economics. Think of it – ten cents to copy an illustrated page from some French book, thirty seven cents for a first class stamp, and you can place in Gerald’s soft, pink hands something that will cause his righteous indignation to stiffen, and rise. And make his Alabama office costs rise to Biblical proportions.

Oh, the joy. As Gerald receives this kind of help from millions of anonymous, helpful Americans, no doubt he will weep with joy at the continued flood of soiled dirt and eye-raising art in dire need of burying that arrives in his office each morning.

If Gerald wants art and literature, and dirt to bury it with, let him have it.

Comment by Antifa — 12/1/2004 @ 10:27 pm
http://www.bluelemur.com/index.php?p=464