I try to get all my fail in before breakfast, everyday. Then it's out of the way and I can get on with my day. Of course, the problem is that I don't usually eat breakfast until about lunch time, which seems to quadruple the possible fail moments for me. I think my system needs work.
Ahem.
unless they're also a minority, they won't get to any great depth what a profound lack of privilege in a normal social setting is like or what being threatened with death for who you associate with or love is like
I would add: an 'invisible' minority, at that. There's a certain tension that exists, when you're able to pass, and yet also spend so much time wondering if it'll be this moment or those words that trip you up and reveal you. The strongest corollaries for that experience, I've found, are biracial folks, and those with psychological disorders (severe depression, ADHD, bipolar, etc) or with learning disabilities (like dyslexia) -- where on the outside you can 'look' normal, or happy, or straight. But what undoes the illusion, more often than not, is your own words or actions: a comment, a reaction, who you watch walk past... so it's almost like policing yourself, when it's not also wrapped up in self-hatred.
It's hard to 'get' that when you've spent your life with your difference right there and visible for everyone to see and disdain. But then again, I've known some folks who feel their sexuality has always been just as visible, too, so obviously there's a range -- and sometimes the extent of our visibility (or invisibility!) is complicated by how difficult it is to judge ourselves and our situations objectively.
...and I'm on a tangent. I think I was supposed to be medicating the cat, and instead I'm posting. Whoops! Heh. Story of my life, it seems, and it'd make for a damn boring novel, at that.
no subject
Date: 1 Oct 2009 04:01 am (UTC)Ahem.
unless they're also a minority, they won't get to any great depth what a profound lack of privilege in a normal social setting is like or what being threatened with death for who you associate with or love is like
I would add: an 'invisible' minority, at that. There's a certain tension that exists, when you're able to pass, and yet also spend so much time wondering if it'll be this moment or those words that trip you up and reveal you. The strongest corollaries for that experience, I've found, are biracial folks, and those with psychological disorders (severe depression, ADHD, bipolar, etc) or with learning disabilities (like dyslexia) -- where on the outside you can 'look' normal, or happy, or straight. But what undoes the illusion, more often than not, is your own words or actions: a comment, a reaction, who you watch walk past... so it's almost like policing yourself, when it's not also wrapped up in self-hatred.
It's hard to 'get' that when you've spent your life with your difference right there and visible for everyone to see and disdain. But then again, I've known some folks who feel their sexuality has always been just as visible, too, so obviously there's a range -- and sometimes the extent of our visibility (or invisibility!) is complicated by how difficult it is to judge ourselves and our situations objectively.
...and I'm on a tangent. I think I was supposed to be medicating the cat, and instead I'm posting. Whoops! Heh. Story of my life, it seems, and it'd make for a damn boring novel, at that.