boy! didn't I get told.

[kaigou]

Gundam Wing Addiction feedback sent
by applebee_42@yahoo.com (Apple)
from 216.86.67.206
on 01-Dec-2004 at 21:06:22
----------------------------------------------------
[quote]Until I'm a well-known author with several publishing credits under my belt, I can't afford that.[/quote]

Take a step back, read this letter over again from a completely objective viewpoint and then take a humility pill because, honey, modesty is a /good/ thing and you need to grow some. I suppose the only justice is that you'll be shot down well over a hundred times before you'll get published -- if ever -- and maybe from that experience you'll grow up a bit, but really, you need to drop the diva thing because it's not pretty.

App~~

*shakes fist*

I am a DIVA! Fear me!

Geebus, people.

You yank one damn story from the internet, try to be polite and explain why, and there's always got to be someone who gets on your case about it. Asuka K., got any tips on stompage, or should I just let it go?



So I wrote Tyr, and said, remove my email address. (Zan, same goes for you.) Remove anything that can be used to find me. Cause y'know what? There's no point to reviews outside of the ones I get here on LJ and the ones I get on the BBS. The people with constructive things to say find me here, there, or already have my email address. The rest of 'em? They have nothing constructive to say, and as seen above, often they're just outright destructive.

The irony, of course, is that any such comments/responses on my part would automatically be seen by the fandom as whining. Here, let me play my goddamned violin. Oh, please. Do so few people truly understand the difference between getting a rejection letter from an agent or publisher and getting a nasty email from some malicious person with a keyboard and an internet connection? Like I told Tyr, for over a year now - almost two years? - I've prided myself on being someone who replies to crits and reviews with at least a thank-you. Not always - I get bogged down and fall behind - but I do try.

But it's just built up, and I'm sick of some of these people - a great majority of the email-based reviews, actually. The ones that tell me I'm writing my story all wrong; the ones that call me a traitor for writing a pairing they don't like; the ones that call me a bitch or a bastard for not continuing that sequel or starting this sequel. But the worst have got to be the ones that tell me I'm full of myself for thinking an agent would care whether Dancing is on the web. The one above is the most egregious of the recent lot, but it's not the first. And truth is, those agents will care. And gods forbid they ever do a search and come up with that title showing up on sites and think I stole it from somewhere/one else - because it's definitely a distinctive title - and I sure as hell don't want some agent dumping me for not telling them the story's origins and WHY the fuck do I feel like I have to explain myself AGAIN?

I don't have to explain myself to agents, not like fans expect me to explain (and then get on my case when I do). With agents, it's very simple. I write my query letter. I obsess over it. I polish my draft until I'm quite sure I can see my reflection in it or maybe I'm just so sleep-deprived I'm hallucinating. And then I send off my letters and I get back my rejection slips, and is it REALLY that amazing that the rejections are all POLITE? Why do people tell me that I should be able to 'take criticism' as though having a thin skin for someone's malicious attitude is somehow MY problem? Maybe I just don't LIKE malicious, smallminded, demanding emails. Write this! Don't write that! You're so stuck-up! Those rejection letters in my folder upstairs say things like, "thank you, but it's really not what we're looking for right now," or "thank you, but it just didn't capture my imagination," or "thank you, but we're not taking any new writers at this time." Notice what's in common? Yes: "thank you." They're polite. They know I took time to write them, to write my story, to write the query letter, and at least they're nice enough to acknowledge that I didn't have to send it to them, and that I did put time and effort into it. Hello! Does it really do their business any good if I go on the 'net and tell other writers, "this agency was unbelieveably rude to me"?

Big fat no. Cause, hey, we writers do talk. A lot.

Oh, there are writers I've met who are just devastated when they get back rejection letters. They're in love with their stories, and are crushed when it's not accepted. I get that. I'm pretty much in love with my stories, too, and I won't deny that it's really damn disappointing to see that SASE come back at you with a xerox note that's probably the same thing sent to a hundred other writers in the same week. Not this time, kid, better luck next time. But then sometimes I get comments like the guy who added, "you write a great query letter," which was rather unexpected and made my day despite the let-down. Or the agent who lauded the first chapter but said it still didn't really do it for him, and he admitted that's a subjective thing. It was disappointing, but I never felt like any of the rejections were saying, "you suck." Or, "don't even bother writing another word; you'll never be published." Or, "you are so full of yourself to think your stuff is even worth lining my cat's litter box."

But that's what I get from fanfic reviews, sometimes. I get some very sweet reviews through Tyr's auto-review function, but damn if I don't get some really nasty ones, too. The option of being anonymous really seems to bring out a thrill in some people that they're going to slice at me while knowing there's not much I can do about it.

No. I'm not going to stop writing original fiction. Please. I will be published. Maybe not this month, maybe not next month, but I will, and someday I'll be able to tell Tyr and Zan and the rest of them to put on my page and little note that says: "to anyone who ever sent a negative crit to Sol, please read this." And it'd open on a big page that'd just say, FUCK YOU I WON I'M PUBLISHED.

Okay, maybe not, but it's nice to think about it.

I'm going to go work on ch13 of Dancing, and relish the thought of looking forward to a whole bunch of rejection letters that are polite, diplomatically phrased, and sometimes unexpectedly complimentary. And maybe some of them might even ask for the entire work, and then maybe one or two of those might even say they want to represent me. But at least I know they'll all be very nice about it, and it won't be personal. Either my story's good, or it's not, and if it's not, I'll just keep going until it is.

Now, if you'll excuse me, I have a life to get back to.