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kaigouMaybe I'm a dork for this, but I find submission guidelines for romance publishers to be among the most hysterical things out there. (Fantasy submission guidelines are a close second.) Thing is, it only just occurred to me recently that an awful lot of them require the hero/love-interest to fit the qualities of Alpha. Very hawt, capable, intelligent, very... Alpha-ey. This seems to hold true regardless of which gender is attracted to the Alpha, just as long as the love interest is Alpha-ey.
That got me to thinking (you knew that was coming): when have I ever known any Alpha-like personalities? Well, there's my (non-related) brother, for starters, and the notion of being in a relationship with him makes chewing glass look like a great way to spend the afternoon. Let's just say LEO + ALPHA and leave it at that, shall we? Because his wife is a freaking saint, and knows some secret I don't possess for dealing with that Alpha-ey-ness. Like, maybe, massive ocean-sized reams of patience.
I dated a few Alphas, in my time, but never for long. Although come to think of it, I do find it rather intriguing that (in hindsight and with the years to look back) it does say something about our societal biases that the Alpha-women I've known somehow ended up with this label of 'spoiled rotten' (with the second adjective not always so in-cheek), while men with the same qualities are strong, assertive, powerful. Yeah, well, now I can say they were all Alphas, not necessarily spoiled, or maybe it's that Alphas do have definite gimme-gimme spoiled self-centered qualities and it's high time the boys get slapped down for that along with the girls. It's not attractive in any gender, really. Except in fictional genders, I suppose.
Chatting over dinner with CP about this, and we threshed out the conflation of Alpha versus Type-A. I'm not convinced that the fictional template for an Alpha is really a Type-A, because the Type-As I've known are all control freaks, micromanagers, constantly under stress, unable to relax, while an Alpha characteristic is that when they're in control, they relax substantially, not tense up. An Alpha is capable of delegating; they're the boss who'd say, "do it, don't bother me with the details, get it done, by 2pm tomorrow" -- less time if they're a less-understanding Alpha, but still: they demand, they expect results, and they don't necessarily care about the details. Those are for the lesser folk scurrying about to please them. (That, I think, is where the 'spoiled' impression comes from.)
In modern romantic plot (or subplot), the Alpha most often ends up butting head-first against a Type-A (usually the protagonist, to some degree). The Type-A is expressed towards the negative as a control freak or workaholic, or towards the positive as a take-charge or strong-work-ethic, but it's a personality that, perhaps, is more likely to get its unstoppable force derailed suddenly by an immovable obstacle like the Alpha -- a personality/trope more likely to say, "slow down, take it easy, I'm in charge, now." That, I figure, is a Type-A fantasy, maybe: for once, to not have to stress about all this!
Thing is, the majority of the Alphas I've ever read may be sexxy-hawt for the first month or so but when I think of having to live with one day in and day out, I'd probably end up putting his/her head through a wall. (But that's with acknowledgment that I'm not exactly a personality that does well around Alphas in the first place, not for being Type-A so much as just plain competitive.)
So then I started thinking about the characters I've written that I think are sexy, and where I might have read other characters just as sexy. (I'll admit that I find Thorn, in Francis' The Black Ship, to be incredibly sexy, right along with Linda Hamilton's character in Terminator 2, but I won't say more because such things say far more about me than about any fictional character.)
What I realized is that romance tropes are busy using dog-pack labeling for love-interest tropes: the dominant (strong, powerful, assertive) alpha, the submissive (loyal, supportive, stand-back) beta, the nurturing (compassionate, sensitive, expressive) omega. 'Cept that what I find sexiest are cats.
(Okay, considering how much of a dog-like person I consider myself, maybe this is another route to saying a lot more about me than about fiction so let's just IGNORE I SAID THAT PLSKTHXBAI.)
By that I mean the people I've fallen hardest for hold the same traits I find myself writing in the (often supporting role only, oddly) characters I also find the sexiest: most often, characterized by this kind of innate self-contained... I wouldn't say disinterest, nor lack of passion. But a lack of fireworks about it. Still waters, as my mother would say.
CP: Basically you mean the strong and silent type, like Sam Elliot. Aren't those still around in romance?
Me: But I don't know if that fits. [Character] is strong, and reticent, but he's also a prankster.
CP: Of course there's got to be a sense of humor. Otherwise it's not strong and silent, it's just a brick.
[CP likes to make fun of me for having had an immense crush in grade school on Oliver Reed, after seeing him in Oliver Twist. "I didn't know you liked them that hairy." HAHAH. Sheesh. Then I started going on about, "OMG he looks so young!" and suddenly someone started getting cranky. CATS, I'm telling you, freaking CATS.]
Except the analogy doesn't really work perfectly -- this unnamed-type I'm thinking of isn't like a housecat, with that "you may pet me now" kind of attitude, which is much more Alpha-ey: setting limits, and expecting them to be observed. This unnamed type is more like a stray dog, someone who shows up, is all friendly and easy-going while around, gets some lovin', gets something to eat, and then moves along when the time is right. Very self-contained, and in that sense, perhaps not that threatening (on the outside) but not one easily threatened, either.
ETA: besides, most people don't think 'dog' when they think 'alpha' (in the genre sense), plus using dog, cat, even fox gets definite connotations. Someone being 'catty', or being a 'horndog' or calling someone a 'dog' to mean s/he's ugly, or calling someone 'foxy' to mean they're sexy/attractive. So after minorly lengthy consideration, I hereby suggest delta, to keep with the greek letters, and because Δ is often used to represent change and uncertainty, in the sciences. That fits, to me -- and it sets the rank far enough outside the best-known 'alpha, beta, gamma' but most deltas wouldn't give a damn how they're ranked, anyway.
Much more of a love 'em and leave 'em type than the Alpha, I think -- but not in the actual physical sense necessarily. (A Delta, I think, would feel strong emotional attachments for a long time afterwards; the difference is that they don't seem to make any assumptions on those attachments, but carry on their own way without apparent distress over it.) Maybe the biggest contrast is that the Alpha-ey type is the one most likely to declare "you're mine," while this the last phrase you'd hear from a Delta -- although that in itself may be because it's also the last phrase a Delta-ey type ever wants to hear, him/herself.
There's another quality that I think is integral to the fictional Alpha, which is that upon getting past the armor and/or showy outside, that being 'let in' is a sort of encompassing all-for-all-time, how to put it... to be let in by an Alpha is to risk being consumed.
The Delta type never goes that far; it sticks around only so long as the door remains open. Just in case. It doesn't consume, because it's not one to ever let anyone into that secret heart. Glimpses here and there, and any lover learns to live with knowing that, if nothing else, the lover is closer than anyone else will ever be. Or maybe I find that sexier because I find the action of active choice to be sexy, somehow: to be naturally drawn towards leaving means staying is constantly reaffirming that one chooses to stay.
The character who is seeking a home and finds it, isn't nearly as attractive to me as one who isn't seeking a home, and finds it anyway, while still feeling the lure of elsewhere -- and may even then bring the lover along.
Now I'm wondering what it'd be like to throw an Alpha in the same room as a Delta. Probably rather anti-climatic, given I'd expect the Delta to simply be out the door so fast you'd see smoke trails in the wake. Heh. Dominate that, yo.
That got me to thinking (you knew that was coming): when have I ever known any Alpha-like personalities? Well, there's my (non-related) brother, for starters, and the notion of being in a relationship with him makes chewing glass look like a great way to spend the afternoon. Let's just say LEO + ALPHA and leave it at that, shall we? Because his wife is a freaking saint, and knows some secret I don't possess for dealing with that Alpha-ey-ness. Like, maybe, massive ocean-sized reams of patience.
I dated a few Alphas, in my time, but never for long. Although come to think of it, I do find it rather intriguing that (in hindsight and with the years to look back) it does say something about our societal biases that the Alpha-women I've known somehow ended up with this label of 'spoiled rotten' (with the second adjective not always so in-cheek), while men with the same qualities are strong, assertive, powerful. Yeah, well, now I can say they were all Alphas, not necessarily spoiled, or maybe it's that Alphas do have definite gimme-gimme spoiled self-centered qualities and it's high time the boys get slapped down for that along with the girls. It's not attractive in any gender, really. Except in fictional genders, I suppose.
Chatting over dinner with CP about this, and we threshed out the conflation of Alpha versus Type-A. I'm not convinced that the fictional template for an Alpha is really a Type-A, because the Type-As I've known are all control freaks, micromanagers, constantly under stress, unable to relax, while an Alpha characteristic is that when they're in control, they relax substantially, not tense up. An Alpha is capable of delegating; they're the boss who'd say, "do it, don't bother me with the details, get it done, by 2pm tomorrow" -- less time if they're a less-understanding Alpha, but still: they demand, they expect results, and they don't necessarily care about the details. Those are for the lesser folk scurrying about to please them. (That, I think, is where the 'spoiled' impression comes from.)
In modern romantic plot (or subplot), the Alpha most often ends up butting head-first against a Type-A (usually the protagonist, to some degree). The Type-A is expressed towards the negative as a control freak or workaholic, or towards the positive as a take-charge or strong-work-ethic, but it's a personality that, perhaps, is more likely to get its unstoppable force derailed suddenly by an immovable obstacle like the Alpha -- a personality/trope more likely to say, "slow down, take it easy, I'm in charge, now." That, I figure, is a Type-A fantasy, maybe: for once, to not have to stress about all this!
Thing is, the majority of the Alphas I've ever read may be sexxy-hawt for the first month or so but when I think of having to live with one day in and day out, I'd probably end up putting his/her head through a wall. (But that's with acknowledgment that I'm not exactly a personality that does well around Alphas in the first place, not for being Type-A so much as just plain competitive.)
So then I started thinking about the characters I've written that I think are sexy, and where I might have read other characters just as sexy. (I'll admit that I find Thorn, in Francis' The Black Ship, to be incredibly sexy, right along with Linda Hamilton's character in Terminator 2, but I won't say more because such things say far more about me than about any fictional character.)
What I realized is that romance tropes are busy using dog-pack labeling for love-interest tropes: the dominant (strong, powerful, assertive) alpha, the submissive (loyal, supportive, stand-back) beta, the nurturing (compassionate, sensitive, expressive) omega. 'Cept that what I find sexiest are cats.
(Okay, considering how much of a dog-like person I consider myself, maybe this is another route to saying a lot more about me than about fiction so let's just IGNORE I SAID THAT PLSKTHXBAI.)
By that I mean the people I've fallen hardest for hold the same traits I find myself writing in the (often supporting role only, oddly) characters I also find the sexiest: most often, characterized by this kind of innate self-contained... I wouldn't say disinterest, nor lack of passion. But a lack of fireworks about it. Still waters, as my mother would say.
CP: Basically you mean the strong and silent type, like Sam Elliot. Aren't those still around in romance?
Me: But I don't know if that fits. [Character] is strong, and reticent, but he's also a prankster.
CP: Of course there's got to be a sense of humor. Otherwise it's not strong and silent, it's just a brick.
[CP likes to make fun of me for having had an immense crush in grade school on Oliver Reed, after seeing him in Oliver Twist. "I didn't know you liked them that hairy." HAHAH. Sheesh. Then I started going on about, "OMG he looks so young!" and suddenly someone started getting cranky. CATS, I'm telling you, freaking CATS.]
Except the analogy doesn't really work perfectly -- this unnamed-type I'm thinking of isn't like a housecat, with that "you may pet me now" kind of attitude, which is much more Alpha-ey: setting limits, and expecting them to be observed. This unnamed type is more like a stray dog, someone who shows up, is all friendly and easy-going while around, gets some lovin', gets something to eat, and then moves along when the time is right. Very self-contained, and in that sense, perhaps not that threatening (on the outside) but not one easily threatened, either.
ETA: besides, most people don't think 'dog' when they think 'alpha' (in the genre sense), plus using dog, cat, even fox gets definite connotations. Someone being 'catty', or being a 'horndog' or calling someone a 'dog' to mean s/he's ugly, or calling someone 'foxy' to mean they're sexy/attractive. So after minorly lengthy consideration, I hereby suggest delta, to keep with the greek letters, and because Δ is often used to represent change and uncertainty, in the sciences. That fits, to me -- and it sets the rank far enough outside the best-known 'alpha, beta, gamma' but most deltas wouldn't give a damn how they're ranked, anyway.
Much more of a love 'em and leave 'em type than the Alpha, I think -- but not in the actual physical sense necessarily. (A Delta, I think, would feel strong emotional attachments for a long time afterwards; the difference is that they don't seem to make any assumptions on those attachments, but carry on their own way without apparent distress over it.) Maybe the biggest contrast is that the Alpha-ey type is the one most likely to declare "you're mine," while this the last phrase you'd hear from a Delta -- although that in itself may be because it's also the last phrase a Delta-ey type ever wants to hear, him/herself.
There's another quality that I think is integral to the fictional Alpha, which is that upon getting past the armor and/or showy outside, that being 'let in' is a sort of encompassing all-for-all-time, how to put it... to be let in by an Alpha is to risk being consumed.
The Delta type never goes that far; it sticks around only so long as the door remains open. Just in case. It doesn't consume, because it's not one to ever let anyone into that secret heart. Glimpses here and there, and any lover learns to live with knowing that, if nothing else, the lover is closer than anyone else will ever be. Or maybe I find that sexier because I find the action of active choice to be sexy, somehow: to be naturally drawn towards leaving means staying is constantly reaffirming that one chooses to stay.
The character who is seeking a home and finds it, isn't nearly as attractive to me as one who isn't seeking a home, and finds it anyway, while still feeling the lure of elsewhere -- and may even then bring the lover along.
Now I'm wondering what it'd be like to throw an Alpha in the same room as a Delta. Probably rather anti-climatic, given I'd expect the Delta to simply be out the door so fast you'd see smoke trails in the wake. Heh. Dominate that, yo.
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Date: 18 Jan 2009 04:38 am (UTC)*bricked*
Seriously, I see the type you mean, but yeah, I can't name it either. It wouldn't be "the lone wolf" (to keep with canine analogies) because those have a sense of being all misanthropic and suspicious of the rest of the world.
Kinda makes me think "dingo" -- both because it's a funny-sounding word, and because the animal itself looks like it should wear a bandanna around its neck and be called Sport or Lucky and play frisbee, but it's in fact capable of surviving without a master to open the canned food and likes to go trotting off into the wilderness and woo freedom. The problem with "dingo" when I think about it more deeply is that it only LOOKS friendly and fun, and that it could and would kill you if possible, which makes it not fit the type anymore. Alas.
Also in French there's an association between dingo and dingue, which means crazy and potentially dangerous, which I can't remember ATM if English also shares. Hn.
/useless!
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Date: 18 Jan 2009 05:05 am (UTC)(no subject)
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Date: 18 Jan 2009 08:38 am (UTC)The story had two Alphas -- one with a serious side of SM and pretty much yeah, invoked the response you described, what with throwing the Delta into prison or locking him up in various ways -- Delta was forever escaping. The other one was marginally better (IOW no SM), and pretty much kept the Delta by feigning weakness/injury, then when the Delta sort of came close enough to check, SNAP. I admit I laughed my ass off at that point.
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Date: 18 Jan 2009 11:41 am (UTC)I've seen him deal with Alpha types. I've seen them deal with him. More often than not, I saw him work them and they didn't even know it. Their domination, even if just in friendship or social group, doesn't work on him. He's around, because he wants to be. As soon as what he wants isn't there, *poof*. He would frustrate the Alpha types, but was so funny and laid back, they didn't dislike him at all. Of course, it didn't hurt that women adore him, so he was a good guy to have around...keeps the girls relaxed.
As far as the guy I am talking about goes, Alpha types, he can't stand them. Has zero respect for them. He can't stand pushy people or those who try to force their wants and ideas onto others. He just disconnects. Now, the still waters thing, yeah, holds true. You know what happens when a Delta guy is in a room with Alpha's being pushy and Beta and Omega guys are there, and don't fully want to go along? They turn to the Delta guy and watch what he does. If he says ok, then discussion over, if not, half the guys leave when he does. If there are women there, Delta guy turns to them and says, "Hey, you ladies wanna ?" and takes the girls with him as he goes. HA!
Even back in my wild days, a choice between free party items and dealing with the Alpha crap, or running the night with that guy and maybe getting some smoochies, I followed that guy. YUM!
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Date: 19 Jan 2009 02:33 am (UTC)(no subject)
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