I am totally writing this from the POV of a young whipper-snapper who hasn't fallen in love yet. So um, answers are totally a thought exercise.
What do you think would be the one aspect of your relationship that:
1a. Would prove to you that your relationship would continue -- as true love (forgive the romanticism but what else to call it?) -- even if A/B/C were removed from the equation?
If the other person (let us call them the SO, for convenience) weren't under the control of A/B/C then the proof, I think, would have to come from myself--I'd have to be reasonably sure I wasn't under the influence first (which I guess, with A or C, may not be possible). After that, I...don't know. I'm not sure what would be strong enough proof to myself that would erase all doubt. I'd always have a little bit of doubt in the back of my mind. That being said, it'd probably have to be something drastic, something I definitely would never do under any other circumstance other than loving SO.
1b. Could not be duplicated/mimicked by A/B/C and therefore by its existence indicates your love is real?
I honestly don't know. Even if there was something...I think I'd doubt it.
2a. Would the means make any difference in your reaction -- that is, whether the in-love is thanks to magical whammy, misfired neurons, or survival instinct gone haywire?
I suspect my first reaction, whatever the cause, would be disbelief. Beyond that...
The first two would be slightly easier to bear, I guess, in that the cause is external and therefore that means any outside control of my person by another could be ended (even if this means ending the relationship). They'd probably provoke more anger in me than fear.
The third is much scarier, because it seems to me that it'd bring the possibility that I'm doing it to myself, which then begs the question of whether or not the relationship could be truly said to be induced -- it might not be born out of love, but it's still the result of my own actions/emotions. Either way, the thought that something would be awful enough that the only way to survive was to make myself fall in love would also be pretty scary.
I'm not sure which one would make me feel worse for the hypothetical SO. Either way, the person gets to deal with a relationship that may be grounded on false pretenses, assuming the relationship was two-sided.
2b. Which of the three would be most offensive as a means of manipulation (or is it all-the-same)?
C would be more terrifying but not necessarily offensive, unless the instinct was intentionally provoked by an outsider. In which case C would more or less hold the same offense factor as A and B. So...I don't think there's any difference. All three methods would be based on forcing me to feel something I would not be naturally inclined to feel.
2c. Which would you consider most easily forgiven? (eg, "I can accept drugs but if you magic on me, that's way worse".)
Tough to say. It would depend on the circumstances and intent entirely -- if it was magic, it may have been an honest mistake, which is more forgivable than drugs. It's harder to "accidentally" slip love-inducing pills into someone's food. As for the third...I'm not sure. It would feel like a more fundamental violation of my self, I think, and that might be harder to forgive no matter the circumstances or intent.
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Date: 28 Oct 2008 11:26 pm (UTC)What do you think would be the one aspect of your relationship that:
1a. Would prove to you that your relationship would continue -- as true love (forgive the romanticism but what else to call it?) -- even if A/B/C were removed from the equation?
If the other person (let us call them the SO, for convenience) weren't under the control of A/B/C then the proof, I think, would have to come from myself--I'd have to be reasonably sure I wasn't under the influence first (which I guess, with A or C, may not be possible). After that, I...don't know. I'm not sure what would be strong enough proof to myself that would erase all doubt. I'd always have a little bit of doubt in the back of my mind. That being said, it'd probably have to be something drastic, something I definitely would never do under any other circumstance other than loving SO.
1b. Could not be duplicated/mimicked by A/B/C and therefore by its existence indicates your love is real?
I honestly don't know. Even if there was something...I think I'd doubt it.
2a. Would the means make any difference in your reaction -- that is, whether the in-love is thanks to magical whammy, misfired neurons, or survival instinct gone haywire?
I suspect my first reaction, whatever the cause, would be disbelief. Beyond that...
The first two would be slightly easier to bear, I guess, in that the cause is external and therefore that means any outside control of my person by another could be ended (even if this means ending the relationship). They'd probably provoke more anger in me than fear.
The third is much scarier, because it seems to me that it'd bring the possibility that I'm doing it to myself, which then begs the question of whether or not the relationship could be truly said to be induced -- it might not be born out of love, but it's still the result of my own actions/emotions. Either way, the thought that something would be awful enough that the only way to survive was to make myself fall in love would also be pretty scary.
I'm not sure which one would make me feel worse for the hypothetical SO. Either way, the person gets to deal with a relationship that may be grounded on false pretenses, assuming the relationship was two-sided.
2b. Which of the three would be most offensive as a means of manipulation (or is it all-the-same)?
C would be more terrifying but not necessarily offensive, unless the instinct was intentionally provoked by an outsider. In which case C would more or less hold the same offense factor as A and B. So...I don't think there's any difference. All three methods would be based on forcing me to feel something I would not be naturally inclined to feel.
2c. Which would you consider most easily forgiven? (eg, "I can accept drugs but if you magic on me, that's way worse".)
Tough to say. It would depend on the circumstances and intent entirely -- if it was magic, it may have been an honest mistake, which is more forgivable than drugs. It's harder to "accidentally" slip love-inducing pills into someone's food. As for the third...I'm not sure. It would feel like a more fundamental violation of my self, I think, and that might be harder to forgive no matter the circumstances or intent.